Thursday. Two rows of Hyrna Herborgar left to finish.
4:45 am: Fix cup of coffee and sit down at kitchen table. Sip coffee. Sigh with utter contentment. Pick up Hyrna and knit two stitches.
4:46 am: Hear frantic squeaking and thumping in the dining room.
4:47 am: Separate cat from adorable little bunny rabbit. Bunny hops frantically around the living room caroming off windows, furniture, and fragile pottery. Cat hops frantically in my arms.
4:48 am: Yell for spouse, who tears down stairs in the altogether. Cat and I watch spouse chase bunny around the house with a colander and cookie sheet. (Note to self: Next time, grab camera instead of cat).
5:02 am: Spouse flops colander on top of bunny, slides cookie sheet underneath bunny, and removes squeaking animal from house.
5:04: am: Release cat, bandage arm, wipe bloodstains off cat, replace shredded nightgown. Remove bunny fur from furniture and spouse. Sweep up shattered pottery.
5:30 am: Resume position at kitchen table. Pick up Hyrna. Knit three stitches.
5:32 am: Oven timer beeps. And beeps. And beeps. Oven panel flashes an F1 error code.
5:40 am: Flip off oven circuit breaker and leave message on repairman's answering machine.
5:45 am: Resume position at kitchen table. Make fresh cup of coffee. Pick up Hyrna.
6:15 am: Finish row. Turn knitting. Knit 1 stitch.
6:16 am: Aliens land in back yard.
7:00 am: Finish printing out MapQuest directions to White House and give to aliens.
7:01 am: Pick up empty bottles of Romulan Ale tossed into the pachysandra by aliens.
7:30 am: Resume position at kitchen table. Check in on Ravelry.
9:00 am: Finish replying to numerous hysterical and/or angry postings about several tempests in a molehill. Or mountains in a teapot. Either mixed metaphor is an excellent description.
9:01 am: Pick up Hyrna and knit two stitches. Spouse wanders into kitchen and makes noise. Drop stitches.
10:00 am: Pick up stitches, perform successful stitch count, and knit three stitches.
10:01 am: House cleaner arrives and flips on the Vacuum Cleaner of Doom.
10:02 am: Pack up Hyrna and do actual, for-pay work.
2:35 pm: Spouse takes cat to vet for annual shots, House cleaner gives one final vrooom and exits.
2:36 pm: Resume position at kitchen table and pick up Hyrna. Finish row.
3:30 pm: Pick up crochet hook and begin binding off.
3:45 pm: Spouse returns with highly annoyed cat. Drop stitches.
4:00 pm: Fix dropped stitches. Delete hate mail from Ravelry mailbox.
4:20 pm: Flock of frolicking dragons land in front yard, torching hydrangeas.
4:22 pm: Chase dragons out of yard with fire extinguisher.
5:02 pm: Clean up dragon rubble. Replace smoke-damaged t-shirt. Notice alien ship teetering precariously in prize Japanese maple.
5:35 pm: Finish printing out directions to Kremlin because White House refused aliens entry (more than 3 ounces of shampoo in gift box). Give aliens several plastic trash bags and instructions for use.
6:45 pm: Finish Hyrna and pin out.
7:30 pm: Sit down to write blog post.
7:31 pm: Harry turns on karaoke machine and begins a horrific rendition of "I Like The Nightlife" (Alicia Bridges).
7:32 pm: Rip karaoke machine plug out of wall. Chase annoying spider with can of Raid. Spider tweaks pins out of Hyrna and tosses said pins into waterbed.
7:34 pm: Carefully tweeze pins out of waterbed. Patch holes.
9:00 pm. Re-pin Hyrna.
10:10 pm: Take photos.
Pattern: Hyrna Herborgar
Yarn: Hamanaka Parfait (55% mohair, 45% silk), 1 ball each white, black, light gray, dark gray